Friday, January 21, 2011

Bring on the Bad Guys!

The earthquakes have rumbled.  The chains have been broken.  Everyone has cursed the green movement.  The roosters have crowed.  It's time!

Those still left by the sea notice the oceans begin to swirl.  Jormungand, the Midgard Serpent, twists in fury and makes his way toward land. Those unfortunate enough to witness this rare event will soon die a horrifying death as Jormungand breaths on the land.  The ground is stained by his poisonous breath.  The sky is stained by it as well.  There is just not enough Scope, Listerine, or Orbitz gum left in the world to clean that dirty mouth! 
As he continues to churn the waves, the ship Naglfar gets loose.  This is no S. S. Minnow.  This ship is made from the fingernails of dead men.  The giants quickly board this boat and sail towards the battlefield. 

A second ship sets sail from Hel (that's right, H E single hockey stick) carrying all it's inhabitants with Loki as their leader.  Who are the inhabitants of Hel?  Well, if you die bravely in battle, you go to Valhalla (or get picked up by Freya and taken to her love palace).  If you drown, you get taken to Ran's palace under the sea.  everyone else, which pretty much includes those unfortunate to get sick, the cowardly, and the evil go to Hel.  And now, they ride with Loki.

Surt, a giant with one big fiery sword, leads the fire giants into battle against the gods.  The sword he carries is so big and fiery that is scorches the earth, killing most of those who survived the winter, survived the darkness, survived the crazy immorality, and survived Jormungand's halitosis.

The weight of all these giants causes the rainbow bridge (Bifrost) to shatter!

So now, the good guys must answer the call - or find good hiding places!  Time to vote is running out!  Who will be the ultimate survivor?

See all the Ragnarok posts.  Just scroll down to the bottom to start reading if you want to read them in order.

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